22/05/2011 by Piercarla Garusi.

A few thoughts…

We would not accept people as they are and love them because they are the way they are.
We would continuously criticize them.
We would suppress our shadow.

We would not accept their humanity, criticizing it, causing them to feel bad about themselves, particularly if they are children or people in a vulnerable situation, causing them shadow and maybe anxiety.

It would inhibit our human interaction.
Each person’s shadow is simply what we do not accept, and if we do not accept our weakenesses we cannot be whole, we cannot be magnificent.

We would want them to be as we want, because we know better.
We would want them to do/think/believe/behave/feel as we want.

We would be looking for approval from them.
We might be ready to manipulate them to get the approval we want.
We would try to control them to get what we want.

We might seemingly be of great service, but we might not respect ourselves, ending up feeling exhausted.
We might be of service and giving, but deep down wanting something back, for all ‘we have done for them’.

We would not respect ourselves, put our boundaries, say no.
We might put up with situations, people, jobs, etc. that are not only negative to us, but also harmful.

We would not listen to our inner guidance and intuition to do what is right and good and true for us.
We would not do what we love and our purpose.
We would not be ourselves looking for approval from others.

We would not be true to ourselves and our values and would betray ourselves just to be liked.
We would prevent us happiness, wellbeing, success, abundance because we do not deserve it.
We would not receive the abundance from the Universe.

If we do not love ourselves, good intentions are not enough, as we might be ready to manipulate or abuse people to get what we want, what we think we are entitled to, what we think people owe to us.

Do we understand how crucial it is to love ourselves?

The truth is that Love is who you truly are, you simply need to reconnect with that.

And as you do so, you realize you are loved immensely.

This is the solution to the feeling of loneliness that affects so many people, particularly people who have experienced a very difficult and painful childhood. Give yourself the freedom from that.

If you need a little help, I can help you with Individual Coaching. Please visit the website for information www.pgcoaching.co.uk.

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20/05/2011 by Piercarla Garusi.

Particularly in this big time of shift, a lot of negativity in people is coming up in order to leave. So you will meet people who treat you badly, who behave badly towards you.

Now, so often I hear people who say ‘Maybe it is me, maybe I just made it up, etc.’ And they might doubt of themselves even more because they share the problem with somebody who is not able to listen or respect and who says ‘It can’t be that way, it is not like this, etc.’.

Dear, you need to trust yourself always and trust yourself even more. The person did that, but the thing is that you created it. There is something within us that creates the difficulties and problems we face, and in order to create something different, we need to heal that.

Now, what does it mean to love no matter what? Love has nothing to do with the sweet feeling, with being nice.

It does not mean that we stay in those situations. It does not mean that we have to do/think/believe/behave as they want. It does not mean that we have to do something we don’t want to do.

It is sending them approval even though they did all they did; it is accepting them for and because they are the way they are. And we keep healing our insecurities, we keep being ourselves, we keep loving ourselves, we keep doing what we want, we keep focusing on what we want. And if we know that some people are negative, we will not ask them for help when we need, we will show our vulnerability to people who are positive.

Piercarla Garusi runs workshops to help create a shift in consciousness in the way we treat one another and support individuals to be treated well. More information can be found on the website www.pgcoaching.co.uk. She is also a spiritual painter and her paintings are for healing and a shift in consciousness . You can view them on www.piercarla-paintings.co.uk.

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19/05/2011 by Piercarla Garusi.

The ego is very strong and if we take things personally, even if somebody has done something wrong to us, we are not going to let it go easily.

The truth is that whatever we experience, we have created it, and if we take things personally we are going to get even more angry.

If, on the other hand, we do not take it personally, we can much more easily shift focus to what we want to create instead.

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19/05/2011 by Piercarla Garusi.

Countries where there is not a strong sense of family look at countries where there is with a sense of envy. But they do not know how family beliefs could destroy us.

Beliefs such as: you have to be open with your family, you owe to your family, your family has rights over you, they can not respect your boundaries or your will because they are family, your family has to know about you, and many more - can really destroy your happiness, your wellbeing, your success, your inner peace.

One thing is the sense of warmth and beautiful closeness that can be created in the family, another thing is if the members of the family use it to manipulate or abuse.

If they have abusive beliefs, if they are abusive, it is their choice, their process of healing and growth is their choice - you need to protect yourself. You can love them, but you need to protect yourself. You might still have contact with them, but put very strong boundaries and create the life you want. Take care of yourself.

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19/05/2011 by Piercarla Garusi.

There are so many beliefs about ‘love’ that cause so much pain, that cause people to stay in negative energies and relationships, to keep being treated badly. We need to free from them because they have nothing to do with what being loving and love are.

Those beliefs confuse love with being nice, with being sweet, with being quiet or meek. They confuse being compassionate and tolerant with putting up with being treated badly, with staying in negative situations, with keeping having contacts with people who are currently negative.

It is completely mistorted what being loving and love are. Being loving has nothing to do with accepting being treated badly. We need to take always 100% responsibility as we created it, so that we can create something else.

And somehow there is something that cause people not to trust their perception that a situation is not right, that some people are not behaving correctly.

You need always to trust your deepest perceptions, they always know what is right and good and true for you, and follow them. You see how people currently are, they choose their growth, and you choose whether and in which measure to have a relationship with them.

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18/05/2011 by Piercarla Garusi.

I wrote many years ago an article on emotional/mental abuse and it is probably the one that has received the most, continuous and consistent hits over the years.  It is still that way.

I know very well what emotional and mental abuse are and that is why I do the work I do and that is why I am creating these new trainings which encompass many many areas and aspects to help bring about healing in the way we treat one another. I speak from within it, not about it.

And I want to give you now some ideas on how to overcome it, how to heal, be free and feel your full power.

So many people are suffering in the world because of it, because of  bullying, mobbing, being treated badly for so many reasons. The percentage of people suffering from anxiety, fears, social anxiety, depression, self -harm, OCD, depression and suicide linked to it are ever increasing, and we need to do something to help, collectively. 

And we need to heal ourselves to be the magnificent being we truly are and live our purpose. You see, each one of us has a purpose, and it is not simply living a meaningful life, living on purpose, it is about finding what God’s magnificent plan for you is, to help humanity evolve.

Now, if you have been abused the only way to freedom that I have personally found is to take full responsibility for it. We made some agreements prior to birth to experience this, for some reasons we do not know, maybe they are part of our purpose. It can be extremely tough, but if you do so, you can find freedom and power.

The very first step is finding a way to release all the pain, the hurt, the anger, the rage, all the feelings associated with it. And in my experience, because abuse can be so incredibly painful, disempowering and causes a person to feel trapped and powerless, the help of the Angels, Archangels and Ascended Masters is needed. Ask them, they are here to help.

We need to let go of wanting the people who abused us to admit it, to recognized it - they won’t. And we need to let go of wanting them to say sorry. Even if you tell them maybe after many years of all your pain and struggle, they will maybe deny your feelings, your truth,  they will justify their behavior, they willl maybe blame you. And they might still be the same, with the same abusive patterns and beliefs, but as you heal yourself, they will respond differently to you. You protect yourself by becoming whole.

The ego will not want you to let that go, particularly if you have suffered deeply, because the ego will want the pain to be acknowledged - the person who needs to acknowledge it first and foremost is you. Then you may find validation by other people, by society - in the society where I was living, abuse was not recognized, it was normal to treat people in that way - that made the pain even more deep. But we need to find the courage and the strenght to let all of that go with the desire of our spiritual growth, be free from the negative aspects of the ego and discover our true nature. You see, each one of us is unlimited, with unlimited power, our true divine nature is that, and we can reconnect with that when we let go of the negativity from the ego.

Then there are all the patterns linked to what you have experienced; beliefs they had that you bought into, what they told you that you bought into, rules, shoulds that just caused you to feel trapped in a cage, feeling bad about yourself, beating yourself up because it happened, etc. : you need to find a way to free from it all, because it is essential that, for yourself and to deal with them, you feel in control of your life, that you love yourself, that you feel supported and loved by the Universe.

There is something to be said about forgiveness because it is so misunderstood and again can be used in manipulative ways; first of all, forgiveness is NOT optional, it is necessary as the air, and if we created the abuse, it is obvious. But forgiveness does not mean to forget, it does not mean that you will have a contact with them, it means letting go of all negativity towards them, send them some approval and live the life you want.

Now you can choose for your life, you have the freedom to do, feel, think, believe whatever you want. You can choose to make you happy, to love yourself, to be loved. You can choose how you wish to be treated, you can choose the people you want to have in your life, you can choose everything you want. And with loving yourself and using the power of your mind to manifest what you want, there lies your full power.

Put your happiness, your life, loving yourself, doing what is right and good and true for you, what you want, your spiritual growth, purpose and freedom first. And you will find that love is all there is.    

P.S.: please pass this post onto someone you know who might be helped by it, thank you

Piercarla Garusi Copyright 2011 – all rights reserved 

Piercarla Garusi runs workshops to help create a shift in consciousness in the way we treat one another and support individuals to be treated well. More information can be found on the website www.pgcoaching.co.uk. She is also a spiritual painter and her paintings are for healing and a shift in consciousness . You can view them on www.piercarla-paintings.co.uk.

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17/05/2011 by Piercarla Garusi.

When we face difficulties, problems, maybe very painful, maybe we have been victimized, bullied, abused, cheated, betrayed, etc., the first instinct is to blame the person/people who caused it, get angry, maybe enraged, feel hurt, etc. 

But the truth is that we create our reality, even if it is not evident to us, maybe with some agreements we made before birth. And unless we heal within ourselves those patterns that caused the problems, difficulties and pain, they will repeat themselves over and over.

And those patterns have to do with beliefs, beliefs we have bought into, with feeling not whole within ourselves, with feeling bad about ourselves, with feeling not enough.

As I said in a previous post, all that we have not healed yet will come up. We are in such changing times and many shifts are occuring. I also said in another post that at this particular time, the Angels, Archangles and Ascended Masters are even closer to us to help us heal.

If we change job, house, country, relationship, family, etc. but we do not heal ourselves, it will repeat over and over. The only way is to change the situation within. When we become ok with what is and heal ourselves, we are then free to create the life we want.

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15/05/2011 by Piercarla Garusi.

All people in our life, even the people who treat us badly, the people who bully or abuse us  are there to help us on our way to freedom from the ego.

Because we create our reality, they are there to show us our subconscious programs, so that we can let that them go.

The first instinct of the ego when somebody treats us badly is to react, it is to get angry because we want to be treated differently.We feel hurt, we might feel powerless, angry, maybe enraged.

But we need to find a way to let all of that go. And we need to continue the process with discovering what it is within us that caused that - why people, maybe certain kind of people, are treating us badly? What is it in us that cause us to be victimized?

There might be some very deep work to do, but as you do that, you free yourself to be loved.

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15/05/2011 by Piercarla Garusi.

This can be a very difficult question, if we feel very hurt, if somebody treats us badly, if we feel abused.

But at the same time it is very empowering and also helps the Planet.

Yes, maybe somebody is behaving badly, maybe they are treating us very badly, but if we take responsibility, first of all the anger and rage associate with it diminishes - for the great benefit of the Planet, as we are all connected and everything is energy and if we put out in the Universe negative energy because we feel victimized, we just add to the negative energy of the Universe - and if we heal in ourselves that which created it, we will not experience it again in the future.

It is a question of taking responsibility for everything.

You might want to read the entry Are you being treated badly, maybe at work? for further insights.

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13/05/2011 by Piercarla Garusi.

Are you being treated badly, maybe at work?

By Piercarla Garusi 

Then you might need to try the metaphysical way.

When something happens, when somebody, maybe a colleague, treats us badly, perhaps they criticize us, bully us, put us down, humiliate us or try to manipulate us, the first reaction is to feel hurt or get angry: why did they do that to us? Or maybe we think that it is our fault and we start beating ourselves up, feeling even worse.

Maybe we try various things – we talk to our friends, to our boss, we study various techniques, we go to assertiveness courses to stand up for ourselves, but maybe it does not work; perhaps we do tell them how we feel, how hurt we feel, how we would like to be treated, but the only thing we obtain is that they deny they did anything wrong and keep doing the same, and we end up feeling even more out of control, maybe doubting of ourselves, angry and hurt. All of this can be extremely painful, damaging and might cause us to feel powerless and trapped, as we might think we need to keep that job, particularly in this moment. And maybe when we talk to people, some people tell us not to take things personally, which is always necessary, but is it enough? Yes, the person might be stressed out and be treating people without respect, but do we really want to keep working with them, in the same place? Also, it is important to remember that taking things not personally does not mean justifying or putting up with it; they treated us badly, but we, as you read below, have created it on some level of reality.  

In fact, Albert Einstein said: “No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it”. We need to look at the problem from another perspective.

Yes, the person is having a behavior that is not respectful towards us, but are they really doing something to us? And how can we change the situation so that we are treated well?

We need to remember that everything in the Universe is energy and that there are laws, somebody calls them universal laws, somebody spiritual laws - one of them is that positive attracts positive and negative attracts negative. If we are negative we attract negative things in our life. This means that we have indeed attracted on some deeper level of reality the people that did or are treating us badly. But as we have attracted them, we can also shift the situation and attract people that treat us well as we desire and deserve.

What do we need to do?

We need to let go of all the negativity, beliefs, subconscious patterns that cause us to be treated badly. And of course, one very important part is how we treat ourselves, because if we treat ourselves badly, we keep attracting negative energy.  Dealing with the negativity, beliefs and subconscious patterns might require a lot of work, particularly if we have been programmed with beliefs that cause us to be a victim,  and with beliefs I call anti-happiness beliefs. We also need to consider how we are treating those people, because if we treat them badly because they treated us badly, again it is only negativity.

And once we free from all the negativity and patterns and we love ourselves and those people too, we are empowered to create the reality we want. And you might wonder whether those people will change? Maybe. It might be possible that those people will change, but it is not our domain - it will be their choice if they decide so. It is likely they might change towards us but they are responsible for their negativity and so their growth; or we might find ourselves in a totally different reality, a reality where people do love and respect us.

You have the power to make a change and the power is always in the present moment by setting an intention. You can do it. Do it now.

Piercarla Garusi Copyright 2011 – all rights reserved 

Piercarla Garusi runs workshops to help create a shift in consciousness in the way we treat one another and support individuals to be treated well. More information can be found on the website www.pgcoaching.co.uk. She is also a spiritual painter and her paintings are for healing and a shift in consciousness . You can view them on www.piercarla-paintings.co.uk.

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